January 24, 2015 § 2 Comments
I bound my arms around you
pressing my head against your back
Securing your flesh, bone, heartbeat
Your spirit secretly interwoven
Between my fingers
a tear slowly falls between
dampening the bed linen
You are warm
Your breaths are slow
you don’t reciprocate
no subtle movements
in joining me
Nor placing your hands over mine
I cannot yield this love
I cannot produce anything tangible
To prove what this is
Feeling you between my arms
Alongside my heart, and soul
For this moment
And all future moments
when I time travel back
for your scent
for your warmth
I will travel to Now
the last moment I shared with you
May 28, 2014 § Leave a comment
Maybe depression is a time of healing for me. Certain parts of me shut down or go away to heal and leave me to survive on the basics.
I experienced joy once in the last two weeks. I was looking at my son through a camera lens clicking every move he made while playing baseball and it hit me in my gut. Joy never comes quietly. My son was excited, encouraging others – he was definitely in a moment of Bliss.
I laughed and cried at the same time. For me it is a sensation so rare that I almost react impulsively, or as if, I have a tick. I always look around for any watchers – maybe someone caught that moment and I could smile with them.
I visited that moment a million times since it occurred. Not recalling the Joy but recalling his moment of bliss.
May 4, 2014 § Leave a comment
It’s too easy to pass judgement on people.
Love will see us through anything.
April 13, 2014 § Leave a comment
She stood away of everyone else
holding down her wings of rusty knives
filled with fear and sadness
tears escaped from her eyes
and that would be the last day
she was allowed anything authentic to say
She did not know it yet
but the day would come
she would raise up her wings
throw her head back
and with bold proclamation
stomp blatantly on the floor with one foot